So, I’m sitting here watching MTV, and I see this show come on called Super Sweet 16, which from gathering info from my sister and the info that the dish’s program guide gives me, that chronicles a young lady’s 16th birthday party. When I sit down and start the show, I expect to see all the nervousness and excitement that is supposed to tag along with you on this milestone birthday. What I do see drops my jaw, and makes me say words I reserve for enemies. This chronicles everything that is horrible with today’s youth.
1.) This isn’t your regular party: I can see going all out for this party. It’s the start of what many call the “girl’s passage into womanhood”. To me, here in Middle of Nowhere, KY, this may mean dropping anywhere from a couple of hundred to a couple of thousand dollars. And that’s ALOT of money, no matter where you go. That amount won’t even cover the dresses that these young brats are wearing. As I watched one show come to a close, the father of the young lady said into the camera that including the RANGE ROVER, he was shelling out almost $200,000 for this party. And that was his half, seeing as the girl’s mother and father were divorced. Again, I had to apply the five second rule to my jaw, and continue watching.
2.) The kid already has EVERYTHING: As you can tell from the horrendous amount of money that was poured into this birthday shin-dig, money is no object to any of these people. In another episode, one young lady pulled up in a Bentley that the family owned to hand out invitations to a gaggle of people assembled in order to see if they could snag one of the illustrious invites. Yes, a Bentley. I guess the people that can afford the $250,000+ car can drop the same on a birthday party and not bat an eye.
3.) If they were my kids, I would slap them: People can’t appreciate anything anymore, especially money. I guess growing up with a household income of less than $25,000 a year can humble you to certain things, one of them being that there are lots of things you want, not necessarily need, and that there’s just not the money to buy most of them. Every episode that I have watched has had some tradgedy that has been associated with the party. The dress isn’t right, the caterers aren’t fixing something the way they were told to prepare it, and someone is coming to the event that isn’t supposed to. AND IT’S RUINING MY DAY! MOMMY/DADDY COME FIX THIS NOW BEFORE I SCREAM AND HATE YOU FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! Listen, dear children:

It’s JUST another birthday.

Sure, I said above that this one is supposed to take a small bit of precedence over the others, but not that much.
4.) Generosity never hurt a soul: In more than one of these shows, there have been big to-do’s over the guest list. This isn’t the Oscars, it’s not even the Billboard Awards, it’s a Freakin’ Birthday Party. Telling people at the door that they aren’t welcome to attend and/or ripping an invitation out of someone’s hand that you got in a fight with that morning is a little rude. It’s a party, it’s supposed to be a fun time, just let it be.
I guess that happiness isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Happy 16th birthday you little bitches.