Being home sucks.

This break started with the need to get out of Murray. I love Murray. But when I had only left the town for a total of 6 days during the whole semester, it got to be the time to leave. I had OD’d on it. Especially in the last week where I could count my total number of hours of sleep on my collective bodily digits. That’s less than 21 hours in a whole week, for those counting. And yes, that is a digit.

But being here, I have realized that it’s not here that I wanted. Sure it’s a break from Murray and all there-in. But it’s not where I feel my heart wants me to be. It’s like every time I come here, I step back in time. Not only technologically (we’re still on fucking dial-up here. And mom won’t call Windstream), but I regress in my social aspects. I’ve grown a lot in the past three and a half years at college. I grew so much that when I come back here, I feel as if it’s trying to fit an elephant in a thimble. I just don’t fit here anymore. I’m way too big, and this place is way too small. Of course, when I get back to Murray, it’s still going to feel way too small. And I blame it all on the haven of heaven I call Louisville. It’s me, right now. Not too far from home for when family emergencies may call me back. Not close enough that I feel like I am home. Enough of a mystery to explore for several years, but common enough that I won’t have trouble getting around. It’s got everything I need.

Sorry, I interrupt this post for the following breaking news:

FUCK. Or actually, the lack of fuck. Damnit, and I was really looking forward to that.

Now back to our regularly scheduled story.

Louisville, ah yes, how I long to be in the throes of its throngs of people.  Wow, that was almost poetic.

To wrap this one up, I’d just like to say that I definitely have ants in my apnts.  I’ve got the itch to move.  Nothing is holding me back, nothing is dragging me down, the only thing between me and Louisville is 18 hours of class and 20 of work in the spring.  And then, watch out Louisville.  The town will never be the same.